After a slightly quiet period for Stationery Club, it is with great excitement that I can announce the details for the first ever Stationery Club picnic on Saturday 21st August. I can’t remember who first came up with the idea of having a Stationery Club picnic, but whoever it was, you have them to either thank or blame depending on the success of the event.

The picnic will be held in Kensington Gardens, a location which was chosen because it is fairly central, it has toilets, there are shops nearby and pubs in case it rains which it almost certainly will do because I have been cursed by an unkind god.

The specific bit of Kensington Gardens where we will meet is “near the Two Bears fountains near the Italian Gardens”. You may question quite how specific that location is, considering it uses the word “near” twice and doesn’t include the word “at” once, but what more do you want from me? The exact co-ordinates? I don’t get paid for this, you know.

Look, here’s a map, that should help:

The Two Bears fountain near the Italian Gardens is near the bit on the map where it says “TWO BEARS FOUNTAIN” near the bit on the map where it says “ITALIAN GARDENS”.

We will meet at 2pm because that seems reasonable.

As it is summer, the theme will be holiday stationery. Souvenir pens; those giant pencils you can get at the seaside with tassels on the end; novelty pens with pictures of women on them who become naked when you turn them upside down (nb this does not work with real women, I have tried); maybe postcards? Do postcards count as stationery? Who knows. You write on them with pens, that’ll do. Anyway, you get the idea. Bring any related items you own, or don’t bother and just bring normal items of stationery. It’s up to you. You don’t even have to come if you don’t want to. No-one’s forcing you. But I will hunt you down and kill you if you don’t turn up. I know where you live.

Saturday 21st 2010, 2pm
Near the Two Bears fountain near the Italian Gardens
Kensington Gardens
Lancaster Gate & Queensway – Central Line
Bayswater – District Line